Thursday, May 9, 2013

Ben Franklin: Man of History and Mystery

Electricity & Constitution.  That pretty much sums up what I remember from my lessons of Ben Franklin.

Wait. I take that back.

Parisian lovers and syphilis too.  Lessons from The Office: Season 3, of course. 



When I got LEGO Vaughn's request for a Ben Franklin costume for a school event, I wanted to make sure that he looked sharp and dapper.

...and historically accurate.
...and worked the VD info into his presentation somehow.



But I fact checked the syphilis thing, and it appears to be false.

Unless it isn't and was just filed neatly on the list of America's greatest cover-ups, right behind Who Really Shot JFK, and two spots before Nipplegate 2004: Justin Timberlake planned it.

We'll never know.


However, I do know that my quest made me wiser.

Now I know that Ben Franklin established the first circulation library so all, not just the rich, could enjoy books. (Bless you Ben. Bless you so hard.)

...and that Ben invented the odometer to keep track of distance in his carriage.
...and that corduroy was invented in the late 18th century, so I don't have to feel like a fraud for choosing it as the Colonial coat material.
...and now I know how to sew a sweet lace dickie. Priceless.


Oh, there is so much more. Way more I don't know.

Perhaps I will get the Ben Franklin book from the library.  

Because I can.  
Because of him.  
Because I like to imagine the joy that would boom in Ben when I took him to see my busy local library - before our stops to the fire station and hospital.  Followed up by a shopping trip for new bifocals and a salty mall pretzel with canned cheese sauce...just because I want to watch his face as he eats it.

Until then, here's legit facts from Vaughn. My 84-year-old 3rd grade nephew.


Hi!  I'm Ben Franklin   I was born in Boston on January 17th, 1706.  I was known for writing the anti-slavery treaty and inventing the lightening rod.  I died on April 17, 1790 and lived to be 84.

And those syphilis rumors are vicious, vicious untruths. 

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Operation Listing & Sold: This is the End, Beautiful Friend

I don't know why I struggle with finishing things...the end...closure.  

Feeling my chest tighten while I tell myself that the next amazing project can't come until this one gets wrapped up.  Its how I have been feeling anticipating this post, the wrap up of Operation Listing. I want to throw up a little.

Maybe it has something to do with Heidi 2004, who moved into the Operation Listing house just a few months before saying 'I do' to the Amazing Mr. Anthony.

We had a friend take our engagement pictures on the back patio.

Backyard Before

Right under that small arch that leads to the master bedroom.

Backyard Before

Heidi 2004 was rigid, and fiercely independent and kept over paying for blond highlights.  And getting married at 24 scared the hell out of her, because you can't spell 'team' with fiercely independent.  

Heidi 2007 would have told her, You need to trust. Stop the 'what ifs' already.  Things will be tough, but magical.  This man makes your heart merry and will patiently put up with your drama until you learn how to take a complete breath. Oh, and he will surprise you with a sugar stuffed pinata for your 27th birthday and make it dance off of the splintered rafters of the patio covering, so there's that.

Backyard Before

Selling our home made it all flood back.  Like each step of our final walk through sent a tiny little memory package straight to my heart. Remember when? Remember how? Remember that?

I'm so grateful Heidi 2004 found the courage to commit to love.

And am still pissed at Heidi 2011 for not clamping down that piece of wood when using the miter saw on the back patio. Some 'what ifs' might have been appropriate thoughts in that situation.  

Backyard After

Heidi 2008 was adventurous with cooking, even taking a stab at the Ethiopian dish, Doro Wat.  I wish I could tell her, I know that Indian paprika seems like a better value, but it is not a substitute for sweet paprika.  Its not the same thing.  It will make your sphincter bleed.  Each of the 3 times you persistently try to get the recipe right.

Kitchen Before

But keep on cooking sister.

Kitchen After

Because soon you are going to try steamed artichokes and you are going to nail it.

Kitchen After

Each passing year reinforced the enchantment Heidi 2004 felt when people she loved gathered around her table.

Dining Room Before

And Heidi 2009 taught her that it is always OK to wear a visor at dinner as long as it has an attached web cam sending live feed for a video chat birthday celebration.

Dining Room Before

And that it is OK to pee a little bit at your own table from laughing so hard.

Dining Room After
So many lessons in one house.  Just 8 years.  So much transformation and shedding. Lots of shedding.

Heidi 2008 had a different blog. 'The Life of a Heidi'  She sat in the black chair at the office desk and would write up a story about her day, terrified that someone would actually read it.  Her family and a handful of friends knew about it and unknowingly held her hand to cross the street at the corner of "Confidence" and "Grow A Pair."

She grew.

Office Before
But would still be appalled by Heidi 2012's tendency for TMI in her posts.

And even more appalled at the hoarder's nest she'd allowed the office to turn into.

Office Before

But her breath would be deep and shoulders relaxed knowing that she didn't have anything to fear.  And that doing and failing still feels rad. Failure awesome is still awesome.

Office After

Actually listing our house would have been more of a moment for me.
If I would have been there.
And not at Disney World instead.

Master Bedroom Before

I left Anthony on a Thursday morning.  Left him with multiple faucets to install.

Loads of laundry.

And a listing contract with my signature for whenever he and Frank the Realtor were prepared.

Master Bedroom After

They listed the house that Friday night for $214,000.

When this whole process began, we were looking at selling our house, as it was, for $169,000.

The market in Phoenix was hot.

Master Bedroom After

Frank the Realtor had an Open House on Saturday.

And as I was waiting for the Disney airport shuttle on Tuesday, he called me with the offer.  Full price.

I didn't even have to complain about having to live like a neat freak.  I never had to do it.

Spare Bedroom After - It was red before too.

Before we count the chickens though, we need to talk appraisal.

Yes, things were hot in Phoenix, but a lot of the homes hadn't closed yet.  That house flip down the street with the exact same lay out?  Still sale pending, so it couldn't be used as a comp.

The appraisal came back for $206,000.  We were sad about it for 2 seconds until we remembered that only a few short months ago, we were praying that our elbow grease would bring us to $180,000.  We got over it and sold it.

Does a $10,000 investment in sweat, paint, carpet and granite always assure you a $26,000 increase in sales?  I wish.  But the sweat always pays out some for sure. Guaranteed.

Downstairs Before
And somehow, all that sweat made it easier to accept leaving.

Easier to swallow the tears I had as I watched Anthony as he jumped over the closing garage door's sensor leaving our opener, keys and first home together behind.  For good.

Downstairs After

Easier because that house IS Heidi 2004, now Heidi 2013.

More comfortable in her timbers.
Spacious...Open...Not as scared to invite people in.
Just enough cracks and wear to show adventure, lessons learned and to elicit some respect.
Solid bone structure with a sweet-ass back patio.
Ready for new adventures and more memories.
Accepting that the end can be a beautiful friend...hoping that the new chapter doesn't lead to a meth lab.